Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.

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(305): View more from Florida

Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.

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(214): View more from Texas

She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca

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(912): View more from Georgia

Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony

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(250): View more from British Columbia

After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all

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(818): View more from California

On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?

(1-818): View more from California

I'm about a 7.95

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(912): View more from Georgia

He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five

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(707): View more from California

Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank

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(850): View more from Florida

He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!

(407): View more from Florida

You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?

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