Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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