You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
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