Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
