oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
