I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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