Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
