if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
