i think my mom watched the whole time
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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