Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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