I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
