They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
