The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
