he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
