i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
