You're so nebulous sometimes
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
