wrigley field is MILF paradise
oh god the rape fog is back!
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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