He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
