when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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