can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
