I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
