we have officially lost it.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
sarcasm needs its own font
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize