Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
