I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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