: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I did not marry a roomba.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
