Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
