Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
