ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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