i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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