I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Randomize
