Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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