Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
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