haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
