You're completely useless in the revolution.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
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