READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Randomize
