we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Randomize
