I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize
