Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Randomize
