do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
