This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
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