There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
