I wish I only lived at night.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
