Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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