I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I think my vagina is haunted
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Randomize