oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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