Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
