I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
he fucked my hip out of place.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
