First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
