just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize
