Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
