Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize